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the night shines like silver

by roselove

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1.
the streets are lively the buildings go sideways the moon strikes midnight the night shines like silver and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown the lights are sirens the buildings are singing the planet is dancing the city is talking and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown and we all meet up downtown
2.
i could spend a million lifetimes chain smoking on your porch when you stared into my lens the scans stared back, turned to be sore too old to be this foolish we grow cold to get us through it stones fold, reveal their purpose a trite trick sent from a sadist selfishly, i wish i could be someone you adore i wonder when we were drunk if my body felt, to you, a chore too old to be this foolish we grow cold to get us through it stones fold, reveal their purpose a trite trick sent from a sadist i never thought i might ever kiss you when the sun’s up, will i be with you? roll over, it’s not over roll over, it’s not over until the breakfast spot 86s egg too old to be this foolish we grow cold to get us through it stones fold, reveal their purpose a trite trick sent from a sadist
3.
marionette 04:00
i know there are cities where the vaudeville stops can i stay with you after the vaudeville show? i don’t want to think about what culture costs can i perform all the poems that your keen eyes sought? i want to be your marionette tie my hands to a string i think you’d make a pretty nice puppeteer freeze me in porcelain what’s it take to audition? i’ve been stuck in the audience on call to play a part for you i’m waiting for your directions please pick me up and get me out of this place put me to work where two steady hands sing to be your puppet is a rich guy’s game i don’t have much, but i could act the same i want to be your marionette tie my hands to a string i think you’d make a pretty nice puppeteer freeze me in porcelain what’s it take to audition? i’ve been stuck in the audience on call to play a part for you i’m waiting for your directions
4.
tracing patterns of thought i am only what i’m not defined by the scrolls you carve into my skin root-like veins that seek to see the sun a severed symmetry that seems to collide with obligatory methods to waste your precious time if the clock starts yesterday, then shatter it, right? if today is tomorrow, then the love is still alive she’s crawling on the vessel, wish that i could know swollen lymph nodes, illness isn’t simple tracing patterns of thought i find myself a sickly air to breathe a severed symmetry that seems to collide with obligatory methods to waste your precious time if the clock starts yesterday, then shatter it, right? if today is tomorrow, then the love is still alive find yourself, crumpled in the trash you’re crying loud, you’re hurt real bad if it helps, you can tell your little self that it was all dream, you can go back to sleep you got lost, hoping to get caught but it’s raining now and no one’s out so you go to the beach to do some thinking find what energies need rekindling looking out on the eastern prom. you see now that you were wrong you stare down for your mental health you stare down and repeat to yourself: the ocean is big and i don’t know what’s in it the ocean is big and i don’t know what’s in it the ocean is big and i don’t know what’s in it the ocean is big and i don’t know what’s in it the ocean is big and i don’t know what’s in it the ocean is big and i don’t know what’s in it
5.
i was there with you when you first tried acid the world got weird and you got scared of words’ ambiguity after you came down, went back to park avenue i stayed up alone on the twelfth floor and watched as the sun came back around it’s been three years now since i last saw you i’ve been changing, i’ve gotten too thin worn down waiting for any good luck we weren’t thinking that the earth was spinning until it’s movement, we couldn’t ignore just like the first time that you tried acid with me
6.
malaise 03:24
i saw it all, i was asleep by the fire we should turn our affections into a pyre if you want to, you can kiss me tonight but we will leave only ash as memento i try hard, but you don’t even see me you hate your boss and you hate your industry i can take the bus a pretty sizeable distance you don’t talk, but i can tell you’re listening and i don’t have a word to say to you there is nothing left to think that’s new i can’t tell if you are near or far you seem detached from your corporeal self we’re stuck in a haze and i’m growing malaise soon this harvest, we will properly taste i try hard, but you don’t even see me you hate your boss and you hate your industry i can take the bus a pretty sizeable distance you don’t talk, but i can tell you’re listening and i don’t have a word to say to you there is nothing left to think that’s new
7.
halloween 03:55
i could be your bushwick baby if you want me to leave the city, slow down, start something new you could tether me to aspirational concepts of wellness i can try but never feel as true as you make me feel like i’m not just some sick drug addict on a bench tompkins, you make me feel like i’m not just some sick drug addict on a bench you see me whole and you don’t care what’s wrong with you? i like your hair i might pretend i’m your girlfriend for a week to hurt myself with what i’m leaving. i hope it doesn’t end by halloween but i’m glad we met you see me whole and you don’t care what’s wrong with you? what’s right with me? when your band blows up i might get jealous and not show up to your gigs but i know you’ll kill it i might die out withered and homeless up north, thirteen, like virginia thought i would honestly i still don’t know where i might go in november, when the rent’s past due but i hope to find you there in some familiar air, even if you isn’t you you see me whole and you don’t care what’s wrong with you? i like your hair i might pretend i’m your girlfriend for a week to hurt myself with what i’m leaving. i hope it doesn’t end by halloween but i’m glad we met you see me whole and you don’t care what’s wrong with you? what’s right with me? i’m a girl at your bar i know i won’t go far but you know what to expect you’ve met my shitty friends i just don’t know what it is to you, what it is to me you see me whole but i don’t care just kiss me stupid, i like your lips
8.
don’t take the el, it’s far too late outside of new york city, i’m afraid, but there’s not a single person in lower manhattan who could love my crooked nose, my fucked up face now i’m mostly fiending for attention to be seen in a world that rewards the blind i love myself in ways that no one else can it hurts more than when i hated every aspect an unexpected dinner party at beckett’s she came in with her plastic surgery maybe in ten years, we’ll all forget that stupid, little coked up clandestino thing

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released April 6, 2024

all parts written, performed, recorded, mixed, and mastered by roselove
cover art by janos korodi

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roselove Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

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